random miscellany

I see evil when I look in my shaving mirror. It is, philosophically, present everywhere in the universe in order, apparently, to highlight the existence of good. I think there is more to this theory, but I tend to burst out laughing at this point.

Contrary to popular belief and hope, people don’t usually come running when they hear a scream. That’s not how humans work. Humans look at other humans and say, ‘Did you hear a scream?’ because the first scream might have been you screaming inside your head, or a horse backfiring.

“Well, yes, but it’s not about the football.”

“You’re saying that football is not about football?”

“It’s the sharing,” she said. “It’s being part of the crowd. It’s chanting together. It’s all of it. the whole thing.”

There are all kinds of darkness, and all kinds of things can be found in them, imprisoned, banished, lost or hidden. Sometimes they escape. Sometimes they simply fall out. Sometimes they just can’t take it any more.

“Many bad things were done under the Evil Empire,” she said. “The best we can do now is undo them. Will you assist in this endeavor?”

“In every way that I can,” said Nutt.

“I would like you to teach them civilized behavior,” said Ladyship coldly.

He appeared to consider this. “Yes, of course, I think, that would be quite possible,” he said. “And who would you send to teach the humans?”

There was a brief outburst of laughter from Vetinari, who immediately cupped his hand over his mouth. “Oh, I do beg your pardon,” he said.